| I can't judge
my ball in this cool December air. |
| I can't keep my
head still on the back swing. |
| I can't play in
70 degree, sunny weather. I need snow, wind and rain. |
| I can't play on
this course. I haven't been able to practice it on virtual golf. |
| I can't play unless
I have sex prior to playing. |
| I can't play with
these golf balls. They are all numbered. |
| I can't play with
with graphite shafts. Steel is the way to go. |
| I can't tee off
unless a crowd of people is watching. |
| I couldn't see
from back there that it was not a vertical water hazard. |
| I cut my hand
at work, so I can't get a firm grip on the clubs - but I love sick leave. |
| I decided to become
celibate yesterday. |
| I didn't come
to play golf. I wanted to see the Cub's spring training. |
| I didn't flex
my wrists on the back-swing. |
| I didn't follow
through on the swing. |
| I didn't follow
through with my hips. |
| I didn't have
a 3 wood so I had to use my 5 wood. |
| I didn't have
fish for breakfast - I only play well when I eat fish for breakfast. |
| I didn't have
lunch, I have no energy. |
| I didn't keep
my left arm in. I hate this game. |
| I didn't open
my stance and I pushed the ball to the left. |
